I have used a card. I really, truly, sincerely did not mean to use a card, but it was unavoidable. **sniff** Honest. **sniff** Summer internship funding forms were due! Study guides needed to get printed! It won’t happen again.


**Oh the humanity!**

But – to be absolutely sure it doesn’t happen again – and it won’t, rest assured! – a hypothetical question: if someone needed to print something on campus, and, of course, JumboCash is totally off the table, how is that person supposed to accomplish said task? Give a friend the cash to print for you? Add cash on a new, non-ID card as needed? Both situations are problematic for countless reasons.

Your esteemed academic counsel is needed to guide us, poor cardless souls!


2 Responses to Forgive me, Professor, for I have transgressed…

  1. Gorgeous George says:

    Under no circumstance should this student be allowed to print, and, therefore, circumvent the rules of “Cash Only.” Printing is not necessary. The student can, for example, read on screen, peer over the shoulder of another student, or simply note down everything in the article by hand. If all that fails, rehearsing the contents of a given piece as though it were the script of a play, would suffice. If in the event the student needs a printed copy for class, he/she should simply barter with another student who does have a printed version. Coffee for prints; singing for prints; magic tricks for prints.

    Overall, we must remember: DOWN WITH CARDS.

    • Lily Bliznashka says:

      And if the student is submitting an assignment in paper in class? And if the student is finishing it last minute before class?

      As cardless, I’m getting creative here. It’s not called Jumbo Cash for nothing. If it’s named cash, it is cash. What form it takes is irrelevant.

      Sasha = absolved

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