Still Transformation

After contemplating professor’s advice to bathe today because I might die tomorrow, I decided to bathe in the second floor, pretty dingy, bathroom early Saturday night .

 

A Space Transformed-

Candle Flame, Still Water

Lovers’ Arms.

 

I feel that paradox surrounds what we have been talking and reading about in class thus far. Everything changes and everything is impermanent, yet this change has a “form” to it: Orderly Chaos. Second is that nothing is permanent , and yet the “eternality of the present” moment is central to Japanese understanding (Kitagawa p.58). These tenets even give rise to paradoxical feelings. I feel sad that everything I love and care about, myself included, will someday disappear. It makes me feel that nothing matters. At the same time I feel full of gratefulness and alertness as I realize fragility of life. It makes me live fully in this present moment, where my love is, as I know it will soon be gone. This “sadness is beautiful” because it puts us into perspective, it takes us more fully and truthfully into the reality of life (Lecture 1/23).

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4 Responses to Still Transformation

  1. Marshall says:

    This made me realize how infrequently I take a bath at college – something about the filth that is integrated into the porcelain of the bathtub.

    I think your poem really captures the calmness that comes with a bath. I’m making progress towards living in the moment. I hope I can embrace it like you have!

  2. I agree with your last statement about “sadness is beauty” taking us into the reality of life because I feel that people often underestimate the truth and reality that comes along with sadness and often only see the negative side. Also, I’m inspired by your “living fully in the present” I think that’s a great outlook on life!

  3. I completely agree on having conflicting feelings after the first week of class. Feeling the impermanence of life and thinking about how it could all be gone tomorrow is discouraging, and personally it’s hard to live only in the here and now when part of the reason I’m at Tufts is to work toward some future (if currently undefined) goal—x degree, x career—and I wouldn’t necessarily behave how I do now if I were truly living in the present moment. But I’m glad you’ve found your balance.

    Also I love your poem! It’s just beautiful.

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