Who knew key lime pie actually had limes in it?

Growing up I was fortunate enough to be a part of an extended family get-together for a week every summer. Breakfasts and dinners on mom’s side of the family would easily become complicated operations to put together meals that appealed to the masses. My sisters, cousins, and I had our sets of responsibilities too (including the infamous rotating Chore Wheel of 2005) but food prep usually fell to the adults. The default kid-friendly treats I remember from those week-long get-togethers were often either a half-finished sleeve of Fig Newtons or bag of sea salt potato chips. I wasn’t much of a snack fiend as a kid, but even I still got to a point of desperation where I craved something more processed, unnaturally colored, and ungodly delicious. Here enters my Aunt Stephanie.

Picture an avid perennial gardening, many-time-dog-owning, renaissance-costume-making, musical-loving, hyper-active, perpetually-needlepointing nurse practitioner and that’s the person who I gravitated towards the most of the extended family. And every summer I’d inquire to my Aunt Stephanie about when we could make her key lime pie recipe. Her recipe always eluded my memory and seemed encrypted with special secret knowledge which only she could translate into those delicious pies. It literally never occurred to me that this recipe could be easily written down (nonetheless memorized) for later making. But I’m glad it didn’t because in a week with so few fun kid foods I relished the chance to be her sue chef as we spatula’d out the perfectly cylindrical sponge of Cool Whip into a mixing bowl and mashed the remaining ingredients together until only a palish yellow stickylooking slurry remained. My Aunt Stephanie passed on a lot of other gifts over the years, including my deep appreciation for gardening and landscaping, a knack for sewing, and troubles around impulse control at plant nurseries. I still love to make her key lime pie. It reconnects me to my inner-child whenever I do and reminds me that Cool Whip still tastes amazing and is always worth licking off any spatula.

In the late days of September 2021 I was apprenticing at a boat building school where we rotated weekly through being the chef of the day. Someone mentioned they had a key lime pie recipe they thought would be a good crowd pleaser and I lit up with excitement and asked if they also sometimes had issues finding key lime juice to make their pies. They sensibly replied, “No, because I use limes.” And as they went on to describe how their recipe went I proceeded to have one of those “oh dang, my reality’s kinda warped” moments. It never crossed my mind – even into my twenties – that someone might make a homemade key lime pie from actual limes, or butter, or sugar and eggs. So long story short we decided to prepare our respective key lime pies for the group. Sorta like an offering of two graham cracker crust pies holding their own respective family culinary heirlooms I suppose. I opted to throw a hodge podge of lime rinds, flowers, and cracker bunnies on mine for good measure. I sent a picture to my Aunt Stephanie. She approved.

4-Ingredient Key Lime Pie:

• 1 16-ounce tub of Cool Whip
• 1 cup of key lime juice
• 2 11-ounce cans of low-fat condensed milk
• 2 Graham cracker pie crusts

Mix the Cool Whip, condensed milk, and key lime juice together in a bowl. Pour onto crusts and then freeze for several hours before serving. Decorate as your heart desires. Deliciously refreshing on for a summer evening.