Recently, I discovered that being alone started to be associated with being weird. Wow… I thought, but why? Whenever I’m with my friends, I’m very confident and calm, but being alone makes me anxious. The answer relies on the area of social cognition.
Because I was very social and participated in every activity possible at home, speaking my native language and not being ashamed of being misunderstood, this sort of socializing became the “norm,” even though in no way it was. It’s like doing something exactly opposite to what you’re used to, but as opposed to George `Costanza, it seemed that I wasn’t as successful in doing it.
It’s like the triangle of expectations we’ve seen in class, but instead of expecting something from others, I was expecting it from myself, and I behaved differently.
I was relying on my shortcuts, which were formed unconsciously, instead of analyzing the situation, exploring its root, and trying to find out why this wrong perception had been formed. This perception latter was targeted toward creating some irrational self-expectations that were leading me to wrong conclusions. While I’m still searching for the answer, it seems evident that some accessible and rapid pre-set thoughts have affected my perception of myself.