Category: 2017-2018 Tufts 1+4 Fellows

By Cecilia, Tufts 1+4 Participant

My host uncle strums away on his guitar as the rest of the family sings and claps along to the upbeat song “Chola Cuencana”, full of smiles and cheerful laughter. Each note escapes into the air and bursts into a mist of joyful energy, filling the room with an aura of wholeness and bliss. We’re gathered in my host family’s living room in a circle of couches and mismatched chairs collected from around the house, taking in the beauty of the combination of sounds whirling around us. The pre-existing tension in the room begins to fade away and is replaced by a sentiment of peace and unity. I notice how important to me each and every person in this room truly is and how they’ve each impacted my life, and I’m immediately overcome with gratitude. This is a moment I never want to forget—sitting in a circle with my family and host family, exchanging aspects of our cultures free of the struggles of the language barrier, simply enjoying the beauty of the music surrounding me and appreciating the way in which it’s bringing us together.

When my host mom learned that my family was planning to visit from the U.S., she couldn’t wait to invite all of her siblings and their respective families over to our house for a big lunch celebration—which, in the Narvaez family, really means a big lunch celebration and a jam session. My host uncle who lives next door, his wife, and both of their kids are all talented musicians and regularly bring their guitars, talented voices, and musical excitement to every family gathering. This get-together was no exception—they showed up with their instruments and positive attitudes, ready to share the joy of music.

I was initially worried about my family and host family meeting, considering most of my family members don’t speak very much Spanish and the same goes for my host family with English. The first hour or so of the gathering was full of awkward interactions and confusing miscommunications, but the genuine affection provided by my very welcoming extended host family was enough to deem the get-together enjoyable. When we eventually sat down and started to sing as a group, my worries about my two families coming together disappeared almost completely. As the music began to fill the room, the language barrier began to fade away. I felt a sense of unity between all of us, despite our many differences, through this shared musical experience. 

My Ecuadorian family played and sang a few of their favorite songs—including Cuenca’s classics—then passed me the guitar, encouraging our family to present something to them. I have to say, my family isn’t on the same musical level as my host family is, but they were quite persistent, so we came up with something to perform for them. We sang a round robin of “This Pretty Planet”, a song that has had a strong presence in our family since my siblings and I we were young. To be completely honest, the performance was a bit of a disaster, but it was incredible to be able to share something so special to my identity with my host family and create an opportunity for connection between the two groups of people who are strangers to each other but both so important to me. We all laughed through our off-pitch and rhythmically disastrous singing, and when we finished, my entire host family clapped and cheered, thankfully caring less about the quality of the music and more about the beauty of this opportunity for cultural exchange.

This is one of the most memorable days I’ve had in Cuenca so far. What has stuck with me the most is the emotions I experienced in those moments—a combination of wholeness, bliss, joy, and connectedness, surrounded by so many people that I love and who love and support me. It’s incredible to me how the experience of sharing a few songs was able to bring together two groups of such different people—I’ve certainly learned to never underestimate the influential power of music. A piece of my musical identity now exists in Cuenca, right next to the people who have lovingly welcomed me into their family and made me feel like I belong.

By Becca, Tufts 1+4 Participant

Capoeira is art in motion. It’s dance, it’s gymnastics, it’s martial arts. When performed well, it’s two bodies moving as one in harmony. It starts with the premise of constant motion. A simple back and forth step called ginga is the foundation of everything else; stop moving, and you get got. From this base it builds, adding kicks, cartwheels, and other moves. With practice and strength, the moves become increasingly more complex and impressive, but these moves are only tools. One can have the best tools available, which in Capoeira terms equates to handstands, aerials, and a thousand unnamed calisthenic feats, but the real skill comes in how these tools are deployed. Independently, any of these moves may look like a cool trick, but when two partners are in tune with one another, a game of Capoeira is an exercise in connection, the composition of a masterpiece.

My first Capoeira class was nothing but discomfort. After being given the wrong class times, I unknowingly arrived 20 minutes late to class. I entered mid-class to a room of men, all Brazilian, all experienced, and none with a word of English. It seemed to be a learn-by-doing approach, except I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. The only thing I could gather was the format of the class: walk around the room for a minute, then make eye contact with someone and partner up, play for a few minutes, disconnect, and repeat. I started walking, and as everyone mildly-approachable paired off, I was left in the center with a large man, clearly of exceptional skill. He grasped my hand, we crouched, and the match began. He turned out into a slow-motion cartwheel. I stood in awe. My feet remained firmly planted on the ground, so uncertain of the right thing to do that I opted for nothing at all. He began the rhythmic back and forth of the ginga. I stood planted. He motioned for me to follow his lead. I sort of…swayed? I blink, and my partner’s hands and feet have switched places. While still upside down he plants his foot in my abdomen. Cartwheels, headstands, and 1-handed handstands overtake me. I quickly realize that for this man, gravity is more of a suggestion than a rule. The match seemed to last ages. Eventually, the master calls out Caminha! (walk) saving me from myself, and we disconnect. This process repeated several times, and eventually, sweet relief, the end of class.

There was no corporeal discomfort; I’d essentially stood in place for an hour. But what I’d lacked in physical discomfort, I more than made up for psychologically. I was lost and frustrated. I’d been asked to play a game without being given the rules. I didn’t even feel challenged, just really, really, confused. But I went back. And again after that. It’s been several weeks and I’m beginning to understand. By limitation of strength, coordination, and unwavering loyalty to gravity, my toolbox is still incredibly limited, but somehow this doesn’t matter. I show up to class, clad in the traditional all-white garb. The more I play, the more confidence I gain, and I begin to connect, becoming more in tune with my partner’s movements. Capoeira is a game with no losers. It challenges the body, but more importantly, it challenges the mind.

I could offer a lengthy extended-metaphor about how Capoeira contains symbolism for life: just as the ginga never stops, neither does life, or how the best kicks come from using the momentum of the opponent, so go with the flow; the medium lends itself quite handily to such compositions. But all of this would cheapen the fact that I really have learned lessons from Capoeira. My first class, I was so consumed with trying to learn the rules that I didn’t bother playing. But the discomfort didn’t stop me from going back, and for this I am grateful. Only after I gave myself permission to try something did I have any hope of success. I’m learning to connect without speaking a word, extending the capabilities of my own body, and beginning to understand that if I wait for someone to tell me the ‘right’ way of doing things, I’ll spend a lifetime waiting.

I’m still really bad. I can’t cartwheel to save my life, and my handstand is more of a hand-jump -hoping-my-legs stay-up-more-than-a-second. I don’t have many tools, but I’m learning to deploy what I’ve got. I’ve mastered the ginga. I understand how to dodge a kick, and I’ve begun to give myself permission to initiate responses, formulate combinations, even deploying my signature hand-jump every now and again. But the one thing I will not do is stand there. I need no permission to explore.

By Finn, Tufts 1+4 Participant

With October drawing to a close and my third month in Cuenca, Ecuador rapidly approaching I recently took sometime to reflect on how my time in the High Sierras has impacted me as an individual and young adult. I could go into the various little changes that I’ve endured, increased patience, acceptance of confusion, willingness to participate in activities that I don’t understand, but I think the largest single aspect that I identified is a greater appreciation of home. I’m not talking about trivial things and belongings or even my house and family but instead about a simple aspect of the first 18 years of my life that I have had constant access to. By this I of course mean nature. Coming from a tiny mountain town in Central New York surrounded by the rolling hills and lush forests of the Catskills and Adirondacks, nature and serenity has always been a part of my daily existence. Now for the first time in my life I find myself in a true urban setting where the only trees are those that line the streets and the smell of automobile exhaust lingers constantly. In a way I find myself experiencing a “climate shock” more so than a culture shock and there are times that all I truly want is to be enveloped in the quiet of the woods or the ability to gaze out into the dark night sky at a field of gleaming stars. Fortunately, Cuenca has many hidden gems within its limits. Green spaces are abundant and there are even a few areas that can make me forget all of the hustle and bustle of the surrounding metropolis. Overall I have recognized that I am truly fortunate to have such vast natural resources surrounding my home and have learned to appreciate more thoroughly the tranquil region in which I was raised.

I sit in a rocking chair on the second floor balcony, gazing out across my neighborhood and the
eucalyptus trees lining the river. The horizon roars with a majestic pink, slowly fading into a
deep orange as the sun kisses goodbye. I strum away to the tune of Vance’s “Riptide” before
swapping to “Seven Nation Army” on my guitar.

Tomorrow I’ll take Bus 22 over by the stadium to compete in my first Jiu Jitsu competition, after
meeting my German coworkers (In Ecuador of all places) for coffee and a bit of European
culture and language exchange.

Three months ago, or even last month, I couldn’t have dreamed of any of these things
happening; I had never touched an instrument, avoided any sports like the plague (much less
full contact martial arts), and didn’t know any other European students around my age.

I had never painted or taught other people.

I had never worked at a professional bakery to raise funds for a special needs school.

Though I had some experience with people with disabilities prior to my bridge year in Cuenca
(mostly blind or deaf), I had never worked with children with disabilities (both physical and
mental).

I had never taken a public bus, embraced trying new haircuts or speaking to my barber (I look
back and laugh, but it was a genuine struggle, especially in Spanish), or struck up conversations
with Taxi drivers.

I’ve never lived in a household outside my immediate family.

Navigating a foreign country over 3,000 miles away from home: it’s like taking a polar plunge,
diving into a pool of below freezing water. Once you get used to the shock, the world isn’t as
scary anymore. What was “never” becomes a good memory. Our challenges open new doors,
and define us by how we handle them. If we treat our deficiencies as potentials for growth that
we regularly realize, the world is our oyster and we take the reins of our destiny.

Every “never” is a door waiting to be opened, splitting off into dozens more of potential new
experiences.

This year is a launching pad. My first time being independent, my first time in an unstructured
environment, my first time bearing the weight of my adult life upon my shoulders. Everything I
choose helps to define the future me, regardless of the past. I’m reborn from the ashes of my
past self in these nine months.

All the lessons I learn will follow me, and my experience will form a cornerstone for navigating
my future at Tufts with all these wild opportunities I’ve held that many people can’t even
imagine.

I am reborn anew.

By Ashley, Tufts 1+4 Participant

First Month, India, Fall 2018

I am wet. From the moment I waked out of the air-conditioned airport my body has not yet ceased this overproduction of sweat. I am certain that everyone in India knows that I am not from here, as I feel that I leave a snail-like trail.

 I began to wonder “why me” and I awaited the day my body would catch up to my mind, to my new environment. As soon as I would step out of the shower my body would be wet once again, never really feeling clean. It didn’t make sense but how could I judge my bodily secretions when I am confused 99% percent of the time in my new life.  

Instead of occupying a space of an adult figure in my household, I have moved away from that role entirely.

Instead of feeling the need to parent a sibling, I gained three.

Instead of trying to accommodate strangers and friends alike, I am in a situation in which people are doing that to me.

Instead of always putting myself on the back-burner of my life, I have been moved to the front flame.

There will only be more experiences that will be completely different to what I have grown accustomed to in my past 18 years of life and no way to see what will come of that. I can only hope that – much like the sweating- time will work its magic and my mind and body will follow suit.

Present Day

I wrote this during my first month in India and looking back there was a lot of…moisture within that first month. I am about to embark on my second half of my journey and I can confidently say that I no longer identify with that statement. Now I only secrete the respective amount of sweat that could be expected in 90-degree weather with 40 percent humidity. Being able to say this means that I have done it. I am more than halfway done with this journey; the journey that shocked friends and family alike when I told them of my plans. Watching their faces changing between worry, happiness, and being proud was a sight to see. I never did understand why my loved ones were so shocked! I was only moving to the other side of the world for a year! However, as soon as I stepped off of the plane, my foreign body was at the mercy of the new climate. Then it truly dawned on me…my life was in India for the next 8 months. 

Over time my body has grown accustomed to the sticky sheen that would layer over my skin and drip; my body’s attempts to cool itself were in vain as I stuck to my daily 2 liters of water and attempts to stay in the shade. I could not understand why this unusual conditioned seemed to be prolonged. However, these past three months have taught me that, like everything, time and reflection is needed to truly go deeper in an experience.

I made some proclamations that first month that rung true, but I have come to see that the truth they held at the time is now more complex. Having to acclimate to many different new realities- new family, new job, new language, new everything- has made me really want to envision the adult person I want to be.

I want to be adventurous and exist in the world with a hunger to know more.

I want to love others while remembering that there must be the same amount and kind of love for myself.

I want to take charge of my life and allow myself space, while I give space to others. 

I want to be able to think about the future while continuing to live in the present. 

Slowly but surely everything follows suit with time. You just can’t sweat it.