Trip Reflection Sandwich

by Nadia, Tufts 1+4 Participant

This is a story about a jungle, some buses, ugly men, my absolute resolve to have the worst time possible, and a bus stop.
This is a story about learning to expect nothing; expect with an open heart, mind, and hands.
This weekend, I took my first out-of-city trip with the other León kids to Macizo de Peñas Blancas. We first learned of the nature reserve from our in-country staff, Luis. It was hard not to be enamored by the picture painted: a sprawling jungle full of Nicaragua’s native flora and fauna, a hike to the top of a waterfall for amazing views, and hiking through a river! It sounded like the perfect plan, and really, how could it go wrong?

This morning, Linnea, Brenna, and I discussed our highs and lows of the trip. We talked about it like this: one high from everyone, one low, and one more high (for a trip-reflection sandwich, as Linnea described it). It wasn’t until this discussion that I allowed myself to let go of my cynical, bitter, jaded tendencies- that I do love so and consider to be my main personality traits- and reflect positively. So, without further ado; this was my trip-reflection sandwich.

The first high I had was one I did not expect, and it wasn’t even one that happened to me, really. While the group was in Matagalpa, we happened to walk past the central park and past a clothing vendor. As we walked past, Brenna pointed out a denim jacket excitedly. All of us had a collective “yeah I could see you wearing that” moment and moved on to focus on getting coffee. Over the course of about two hours, the decision was made that it was time to try our hand at bartering to get Brenna that jacket. We thought we would have to try to haggle down a 200 córdobas jacket to 50 córdobas. Even though 200 córdobas would have only worked out to be about six dollars and fifty cents, the cheapskates inside us all reared their ugly heads, and we prepared to pull out all the stops: sickly-sweet voices, good cop and bad cop techniques, the classic “pretend to walk away until they give you a special discounted price” move, opening an empty wallet, crocodile tears, and the works. Of course, we planned to do all of this in half-broken Spanish while the stronger Spanish speakers stood in the back to jump in when needed (read: me). Brenna walked over, ready to haggle something to a fourth of it’s price. All of us stood with bated breath as we waited for the initial price point.

Then the vendor told her the price: 50 córdobas. Despite how it must have looked and how it was made obvious we were complete novices at hard line bargaining, we took the offer immediately and tried not to scream too loud. Unfortunately, I don’t have an image of the exact moment when the vendor gave us our ideal price.

Having a victory come to us so easily was exactly the boost we needed to carry us through the next few hours of waiting for our hostel to open. The funny thing about the whole mess was that the six hours stumbling around the city were actually the most casual, aesthetic six hours I’d ever spent anywhere. I hadn’t known I would love Matagalpa so dearly- initially, I had wanted to skip that leg of the trip entirely. Cities never breathe the way we want or expect them to breathe; the process of taking pictures I knew would be beautiful was one of my favorite parts, to be honest. Here’s some evidence of that. 
This was a mural we saw as we left the bus station.
All over the city, telephone wires had bundles of moss around them. The birds were delighted to stand on them.
This particular hill was killer to climb. We had been awake since 3 AM, had the disappointment of a lifetime by the front desk of our hostel, and were forced to walk the city to kill time. Despite that, the high hills made for good views at the top.
One last shot of Matagalpa from the bus station before leaving with a dash of Linnea to spice up a good sky view.
This shot was at the end of our massive hike. To get back to the hostel, we had to do a final walk through a coffee field.
Near the end of the hike, Linnea found herself suddenly without a shoe and the mud found itself with an extra shoe. Linnea was fine posing in a flamingo pose for this picture.
The low point was one I could not have avoided in any capacity: the bus rides. Without getting too far into the nitty-gritty, we absolutely had moments where we chose to sit on each other instead of deal with standing next to strangers that had no respect for physical boundaries. I would have rather had the chance to sleep, but I was too paranoid of something happening to let myself relax.

I didn’t want to let myself be dragged down by the bad moments of this trip, though. The second high was actually post-trip. Linnea, Brenna, and I were walking to the bus station from the hostel within the jungle. Just as we began to go uphill enough to see the road, we caught the sight of a bus pulling away in the distance. In our screaming panic to get to the bus station at a dead sprint, we turned the corner to see everyone sitting calmly on the side of the road, chatting it up. In fact, the bus we had seen was going the wrong way and we had about 20 minutes of downtime while we waited for the right bus. The mist was just rolling over the top of the mountain- a place we had spent hours hiking to just the day before. Getting time to slow down, take pictures of the jungle mist, and finally know that we weren’t on the verge of missing an appointment like we had been the whole four days- in that moment, I was content.

Every trip is full of highs and lows- brace yourselves for cheesiness- as life tends to be. There were legitimately points during that weekend in which I wanted to lie down on the ground and never get up. Even in quiet moments, I found myself desperately wanting to be back in León and to be done with this whole trip.
In the end, I think we often let ourselves be swept up by our expectations. Fun fact: I didn’t want to stop a day in Matagalpa. I wanted to spend an hour at most in Matagalpa and immediately move on to Macizo de Peñas Blancas.

Stuff happens. Expectations change. What’s important on a trip like this is to breathe first and think later. What we failed to do was give ourselves space and time to inhale the Nicaraguan air and just be. When we were forced to slow down, we were forced to enjoy ourselves; to be happy.

At least, I was. I am disgustingly bad at just being. That weekend, I just… existed in Matagalpa as we stomped up hills with our phones out and cameras on. I just existed at the bus stop from El Cuá to Matagalpa while it rained gently and we giggled our way through photo shoots.

So, I was let down by the hike, yes. Matagalpa, however, exceeded my wildest expectations simply because I had none. Funny how that works out.
It’s okay to mess up. This program is nine whole months. Being forced to accept that you were wrong and that the country was right is a blessing- I’m sure that in eight months when I am on the plane from Managua to Salt Lake City, I will be thinking less about my perfectly-executed plans and more about these moments; these moments where I lived on my own terms, in my own time, on my own two feet, with my mind blissfully blank. These moments are how I will learn to live with myself.
Linnea’s mother requires photos of her daughter to hang on the wall- I provided.
I, however, also provide more aesthetic shots that make everyone look like they’re deep in thought or deeply in-tune with nature, as opposed to trying not to laugh while making serious faces.
This is a shot of Brenna glancing at the mist and very pointedly not at the horse’s butt in front of her.
One legitimate shot of a fellow deep in thought!
One legitimate photo showcasing the wonders of a rain poncho in the jungle of Nicaragua and Sophie’s perfectly photogenic, well-practiced, natural smile. Not sponsored by rain ponchos.
10/10 would not go on this hike again but would definitely post these pictures on Instagram again so that’s basically going on the hike again if you think about it.

Dear Class of 2018

by Trevor, Tufts 1+4 Participant

I was stuck under an endless rainy cloud, with no idea of the intentions for my education.

In high school, I was rarely learning lessons applicable to my future. I was memorizing information, not retaining it. I felt like I learned more about how to study the structure of the standardized mess rather than the proper why I study…
Because of this learning environment, I began to lose purpose for education.
Instead of learning for the sake of learning, I began to focus heavily on the results–the grades, the score. I became obsessed with perfection and in the midst of time packing up and moving away, I seemed to lose all direction.

And after spending hundreds of hours crafting essays of perfection, taking entrance tests that the system deems to measure “college readiness,” and obtaining the spotless transcript, I chose to step back and take a risk on the bridge year.

That spontaneous decision led me here today; to a foreign country where I don’t even know the language. Yet, I would rather be in another country that I know nothing about than to continue through a system that depletes my love for learning.

In Brazil, I learn new things every day. Every hour sometimes. And although I may not be learning how to memorize the oxidation reagents of carbonyl or the formula for solids of revolution, I’m learning equally as impressive things. I’ve learned how to communicate without words, how other nationalities perceive America, the importance and perplexity of language, how to make a metaphor for the bridge year literally out of anything, why it’s essential to understand various cultures, and how to keep calm with clever, but malicious, Capuchin monkeys.

So this is for you, class of 2018, and the generations that follow you. If you are entering the college application process, listen closely: you are not alone in this daunting process. Every other class before you has embarked on the same journey. So, if you’re anything like me and find yourself constantly frustrated with the system or you wish to divert the path of normality, maybe consider taking time to travel to a place you never thought you would. Take time to meet new people, expand your horizons, learn a new language, and develop a fresh lens.

I know the decisions you are about to make are going to be hard ones, but those are the most fun. I regret nothing about my decision, even if I had to choose between where I should be and where I wanted to be.

Yeah, Brazil is a crazy mess for me and I am constantly confused; however, I am developing more and more direction each day. I’ve only been in Brazil for a month now and I have already recognized that this eight month journey is a test like no other.
A test that shreds your expectations in a beneficial way.
A test that gives you a dose of life readiness, which is way more measurable than college readiness.

And the first question for you is not why take a bridge year, but why not?

How I Decided To Do Tufts 1+4

Excited to share a post from one of our new 1+4 fellows!! Leo will be spending a bridge year in Brazil, and wrote this great piece for the Admissions Blog this spring!

by Leonardo, Tufts 1+4 Participant

When posed with the infamous question: “So, what do you plan to study in college?”, many of my peers do not hesitate to answer because somehow, they have their life figured out. They say they want to triple major in International Relations, Economics, Linguistics, and minor in Computer Science and German while also studying abroad in Paris and Japan for 2 years (I’m exaggerating). Then the question is asked of me and I answer with, “I’m still trying to figure it out.” I often wonder how people can readily and confidently state college plans that will greatly influence their overall life. My fear of firmly latching to an area of study without knowing confidently what I want to pursue in college is the main reason why I chose to take a bridge year.

All throughout high school, I learned to play the game—the game of success. I’ve gotten pretty good at conforming to what high school wants me to do—take the harder class, write the better essay, do this and that. By setting up guidelines, the American education system has thoroughly taught its students to follow instructions. Students are expected to follow a vague, narrow pathway to college. The thought of taking time off before starting college is still something that people don’t even consider. Flung straight into college after high school, many students often have trouble picturing their career paths and where their passions lie. By taking a transformative year after high school exploring an unknown location and actively volunteering, students become better prepared for the challenges of college. Students will walk into college life and see clearer goals through a worldly lens.

I first heard of Tufts 1+4 when I visited Tufts during their Voices of Tufts Diversity Experience program and the more and more I thought about the opportunity, the harder and harder it was to deny its benefits. I looked forward into the future, not 4 years, but 20 years and I asked myself how I would feel with my decision to defer college for a year to learn a new language and to gain new perspectives. The choice was obvious. I decided to jump off the traditional pathway created by society and into a world in which will undoubtedly learn more about myself and have experiences that change how I perceive the world around me.

Back Home

by Mikel, Tufts 1+4 Participant

After a seemingly eternal journey back home, that provided almost too much time to reflect and get emotional about my 9 months in Spain, we arrived in Boston. Passing through security a TSA officer said welcome home Mr. ‘Quintana’, crudely mispronouncing my last name in a very Bostonian accent. It was a subtle yet strong reminder I was back in the US.

When we arrived on campus we were joyously received by the Brazil fellows, signalling the start of the retreat. Being on campus with the other fellows, Jessye, Mindy, and other familiar faces, all interested in talking about our time abroad, created a small bubble that removed us for a few days from our new reality; being back home, being back in the US. It was helpful and at times emotional to reflect on our 9 months with people who went through similar experiences, but was also a perfect time to share fun and crazy stories from our 9 months. We were able to reconnect with fellows from other countries and reinvigorate an important bond that will surely connect us in some way during our time at Tufts and beyond.

Continue reading “Back Home”

Dear Seattle

by Jiyoon, Tufts 1+4 Participant

Dear Seattle,

How are you? It’s been so long. A little more than eight months, to be exact. I’ve thought about you a lot. Back in August, I was so excited to leave. I didn’t think you had much more to offer me. Maybe it’s because I wasn’t satisfied with myself and blamed you for my inability to break out of my shell. I wanted to leave and see the world, to find a different, exciting, and passionate self.

And so I did. I experienced a whole new world, and I changed.

Madrid is great. Spain is incredible.

I love the people, the sunny skies and beautiful streets. People love to dance and are really good at it, they love to hug and give kisses and laugh. I love walking around the barrios on lazy Saturday mornings, getting lost in the chatter, in the silence, in the singing of the accordions. I love the small balconies that adorn the pastel buildings in Barrio de las Letras, the flowers at Tirso de Molina, and the cozy cafes in Lavapiés. I love how the bars and restaurants spill out into the streets and how all the Madrileños go crazy for futbol. I love the mariachi band that plays in Puerta del Sol, I love the artists that paint in front of the Prado, and I love the smell of bravas and tortilla that wafts into the streets during lunchtime. I love the kids I work with. I love the way they come running up to me to give me hugs, I love that all the girls always want to braid my hair, and I even love all the times the boys play pranks on me in class.

I also love the new friends I made in Madrid. I got especially close with Rebeca and Erica, the two other girls who came with me through this program. Rebeca’s strong (literally) and so down to earth. She’s reliable and understanding and has helped me out so much this year. She probably doesn’t know this, but she’s my secret role model and friend crush—everything from her extraordinary ability to make friends, her colorful hair, to her humor and memes. Erica and I are so similar but completely different. We’re both timid and introverted and always late. We’ve laughed until we were crying and out of breath, had endless enlightening and deep conversations, and have shared the same struggles. But, she hates butter, tomatoes, and condiments and has never tried a dumpling yet. She’s working on it though. I took her to a Korean restaurant and she loved it, especially the bibimbap. She’ll probably come visit you sometime. She’s humble and is always willing to learn, and I love that about her.

Madrid taught me to dance, to laugh, to care, to love, and to live. I fell head over heels in love with it. It helped me get to know myself a little better. It saved me from getting swept away by the crowds, from following a dream that wasn’t mine. I don’t think you can fathom my love for Madrid—maybe nobody really can.

But I realized I love you too. I realized that I love you with all my heart. When it rains, I close my eyes and breathe in the damp smell of wet grass, and it reminds me of you. I thought I hated the rain, but when those moments come I catch myself smiling. I miss your mountains and your pines, your rocky beaches and summer sunsets, and my family and friends who also call you home.

I’m sorry for having taken you for granted. I don’t regret it though. I decided to stop regretting anything, because there’s too much good in every moment to ever waste time regretting. I guess it just took me some time away to recognize that you are precious, beautiful, accepting, and fun.

I’m shattered at the thought of having to say goodbye to Madrid, but I’m glad you’re the home I get to come back to. I think you’ll like me better too. I’ve learned a lot and grown. I’m beyond excited for all the good food, wonderful people, and new adventures that you have waiting for me.

Mientras tanto, voy a aprovechar el tiempo que me queda en Madrid, comiendo toda la paella y tortilla de patata que pueda, bailando debajo del sol y la luna, y creando más recuerdos preciosos con la gente que quiero.

See you soon,

Jiyoon