##### ( Your joke or gem could go here, too.  Just e-mail me.)

One of my students asked Chat GPT to find a joke using measure zero (any set that, for every A>0, is covered by a finite or countable union of rectangles of total volume less than A) and of JC0 = Jordan Content Zero (any set that, for every A>0 is covered by a finite union of rectangles of total volume less than A). Here’s what he got:

##### What do Isaac Newton, Joseph Rapson, and King George the III have in commonANS: They all required Hessians.

Check out this artistic math–scroll to the second page!

##### Q: Do you already know the latest stats joke?A: Probably

Hey, have you ever noticed what’s odd?  ANS:  every other integer.

What did the baby parabola have for breakfast?  A:  quadratic formula

Why didn’t the hyperboloid feel sick?  A: it was asymptote-matic!

A person looking for a place to sit and asks a mathematician in the park, “Hey, is the empty space here closed or open?”  The mathematician responsds, “Both.”

##### Question: If you’re stuck in a dark cold room and there’s no power, where should you go to get warm?Answer: Go in a corner since it’s 90 degrees there.

Are monsters good at math?  Not unless you count Dracula!

##### If you don’t believe in square roots, look here:

What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass??

Why did pi get its driver’s license revoked?  A: because it didn’t know when to stop.

##### A Boston student took 30 items to a 12 items or less check out counter.The cashier asked “What are you, an MIT student who can’t read or a Harvard student who can’t count?”(Of course, everyone knows a Tufts student would be able to do both!)

Mathematicians are like [people who speak their own language]:  whatever you say to them they translate into their own language and forthwith it is something entirely different.  GOETHE